Tuesday, December 21, 2010


Today, I tackled the supermarket with the boys. I didn't really give it a second thought - I've taken them plenty of times before and they just do their thing; it's never any trouble.

But today I couldn't get the 'parents with prams park' so I had to park a good walk away from the entrance.

I didn't have the pram in the car because I was planning to use a trolley. Who can push a trolley and a double buggy up and down supermarket aisles? Not me.

So there I was, a good few hundred metres from the entrance, with two 15 month olds who I can't let walk on their own safely near cars!

I had to get them out of their carseats, but what would I do with the one who was out while I got the second baby out of his seat? I couldn't just pop him on the ground and tell him to stay - the carpark is like a busy road.

So I had to hold Hamish on one hip, while I took Lach out of his seat. I bumped one's head and nearly dropped the other, but we got there.

Then I had to balance two babies on my hips, which, I have always moaned about, and never more so since having babies, DON'T EXIST! The only way I can get a baby balanced on a hip is to jut it out. Ever tried jutting both hips out? Not possible.

So precariously balanced, with two babies, both around 10kg, both hanging down to my knees (I'm not a tall girl, let's put it that way), I had to race across the road and down to the supermarket.

Lots of people gave me sympathetic smiles. Someone told me I deserved a medal. Someone else said "It's not easy is it love?".

But, not one person offered to help me.

I don't know if I would have accepted - you know, in order to keep your balance you must keep moving - so this is probably a moot point in the end, but I was frankly rather astonished.

I was obviously struggling just getting there. Then I had to somehow use a hand (that should have been balancing a baby) to pull out all the trolleys to get to the one trolley that has two seats in it, and still, not one person offered to help.

Plenty watched on in morbid fascination though. Will she make it? Will she drop them? Is this going to end in catastrophe?

What is that all about? Perhaps they were waiting for me to ask?


  1. ohhh Jen, what a day!
    i don't know, sometimes people don't know whether to help or not, unsure if the person needing help will want it or get upset.
    I always ask in such a situation so as not to assume that my help is needed.
    i don't know if I would ask anyone for help as I want to be able to handle things, but sometimes it would be soo nice to get some compassion.

    you need a big hug, hope tomorrow is a better day ♥

  2. Oh, you poor thing! I think the Christmas season seems to be bringing out the worst in everyone - everybody is so caught up in their own hectic shopping/rushing/carrying stuff that they don't even think about offering to help anyone else :(

    Glad to hear that you and the boys made it out of the supermarket alive! xxx

  3. So interesting you posted this! A little while ago I offered to help a lady at a cafe who was trying to pack up and manage her kids and she glanced at me but ignored my question. I thought maybe it wasn't the 'done' thing seeing as I don't have children but I'll continue to offer help knowing that maybe it is. x

  4. Hi Jen,
    I feel your pain and completely understand...my twin sons are 3 and my older son is 6....people just don't get it-no one gets it unless they have twins or more, I think your right on the staring in fascination (love your humor) but wouldn't you think someone could just offer.
    Keep posting I absolutely LOVE reading your blog, it entertains me, keeps me company in this crazy twin thing and makes me smile with each post!By the way your doing a great job!!!

  5. I really identify with this post.

    I live on a farm near a smallish country town. When I am in our town people are always quick to help (even if you don't really know them). Shop staff also help - the check out ladies still arrange for someone to wheel your trolley to your car and unpack the bags.

    In the city people just watch and occasionally smile sympathetically. I sometimes wonder if people are too scared to offer help in case it is taken the wrong way??

    I like your blog by the way!

  6. oh Jen I would have helped if I had seen you! I have had similar situations, although I have one 16 month old and I struggle let alone 2 of them. A couple of times I have had helpers but more often than not, noone does. I have had workers from the shop stare at me. I think it does not occur to them to help. My answer? Online shopping which is great if its in your area or wait until hubby is home and duck out without the boys. I know not ideal but hope you can find an easier way for yourself.

  7. Ah yes, it's very difficult with two.
    We have a crappy (yet very robust) $60 double target pusher that we use when there is only one of us taking the boys somewhere. This does then mean that we can only buy one basket worth of stuff from the supermarket at a time. If there's two if us, we have one in a trolley each. I don't know what we will do in that weird time between them being too big to sit in the trolley and not being big enough to walk around on their own..... hmmm..... :)

  8. PS: the target double pusher folds up REALLY small. And we only have a tiny car anyway. So both groceries and pram fit in the car!

  9. I can imagine how hard it must have been - I find it hard enough when I have to carry Grace by herself!! You'd think someone would have at least help you with the trolleys or something - where's the Christmas spirit?!?

  10. You poor thing, what a frustrating experience! From another perspective though, a lot of people are too scared to offer assistance in case it's misinterpreted. I offered to help a woman at the shopping centre recently who was struggling with a pram and a shopping trolley and she not-so-politely refused. I'm not sure if she thought I was planning to steal her groceries or her child, but I think society has become cynical and mistrusting. Anyway, I'll stop rambling - hope you had a great Christmas!


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